Thursday, March 21, 2013

What's the Angle?

I shot new headshots today with Adam Sheridan Taylor. An INTENSE man is he. He sports a seemingly tireless, skittish energy that goes in your face and then up to your side all snuggly-like and then around the corner to make faces at you.  In other words, I like the guy. Totally wears his freak flag high and mighty the way many of us wish we could.  Just sayin', I'm excited and overdue for an updated look. Not that I don't cherish the meticulous work of Dana Patrick and admire her continued use of film over digital, but I need some photos that reveal my warmer side, both literally and figuratively.

I'll post'em when I gots'em.

On to TONIGHT - a workshop at The Casting Network with Ally Bader, top associate at Bialy/Thomas (Breaking Bad.  I may or may not have been slightly inebbriated when I purchsed a large credit at TCN on my phone because I need to get back in the workshop cycle something fierce. Damn you, Technology! You make everything so easy! It's so easy to COMMIT to things that will better me and my career! Wait, that sounds like a great thing...hmmmm, maybe it's not a guilty wine-induced purchase after all. Maybe I make better sense when I've had a glass or two. Maybe that's not a good theory to draw from this and instead I should just be happy that I can take at least four more workshops at TCN in the near future.

Done and done.

So Ally - what a kind and approachable lass. Used to work for Nancy Nayor and other esteemed CDs - has loved casting since her senior year of high school when she began interning. I'd say she has a knack by now, especially working alongside Sharon Bialy and tackling this year's hottest pilot for AMC "Halt and Catch Fire". Noticing a trend here? From previous blogs? I auditioned for that show as a series regular!  Me! Me! Me! And I didn't get it, but YAY for progress and pushing the ol' chops.  Instead, H & CF went all out with their regulars $ and Name-wise - Lee Pace leading the way. I cannot WAIT to see this show once it actually airs - it is going to feed those of us going through Breaking Bad withdrawal, clawing at our televisions and feening for more Walter White goodness.

Here's the skinny: I went to see Ally in order to put my mug in front of her mug a la "Remember me?" style. She mentioned only working on Halt and Catch Fire right now. She also mentioned that they are casting mainly out of Atlanta for guest and co-star roles where they are filming next month.  She also mentioned spending a huge piece of budget on their 6 series regulars and hence why Atlanta is an easier, cheaper pool to cast from. So why are we there taking a workshop there tonight if there ain't no work? Um, this is the hard part about workshops. Sometimes the only thing you can do is try to leave an impression.  There's no role for you, there's no show for you, there's only the spotlight, the stage and your skills and the crossing of fingers that Ally Bader remembers you when something comes her way that you happen to fit the profile for.

It's tough love, but it's all the love that Ally could give tonight.  She gave everyone sides of her choice, paired us up, and I performed a scene from "He's Just Not That Into You". Haven't seen it myself, but that makes it better for my original interpretation.  There's a confident girl at a bar hoping to see a guy that has not yet called her since their first date. Is she confident? She puts on the airs. But there is desperation there. And in the center of that desperation is a strong, valiant hope that this guy is GOING to call her, or perhaps has lost her number or a relative and there must be some reason that he hasn't.  Because it can't be her. She knows she has something to be secure about and this guy not calling her becomes a wolf at her door.  It could possibly shake her for a looooong time. She doesn't WANT to believe immediately - or even a week later with no contact - that he doesn't like her. Why wouldn't he like her? But of course, his bartender friend finds out what she's up to and gives her the 4-1-1. He tells her that this guy, indeed, doesn't really like her, just as everyone else would've suspected by now.

Oh so sad.  Sweet that she hopes so hard and admirable that she believes in herself too much to accept what might seem blatantly obvious. I can completely relate to her. COMPLETELY.  You can see that she is giving this guy the benefit of the doubt!  She put herself out there and will wait out there until she's sure. She's being brave, not egotistical. But in the world of dating, experience (often coupled with cynicism) will lead to quicker clarity when reading the signs under these kind of circumstances. Duh.  But the problem is not to become a groundhog and scamper away quickly when there's a little shadow. People come to guard their hearts so quickly and so thoroughly that they never take a RISK.  They become too afraid of rejection or of being the vulnerable one.  It takes true courage to wear that vulnerability before a stranger - or even a not-so-stranger.

It's tough that someone can't just come out and say "Hey, you're cool but I'm not interested."  Many would argue that they would NEVER want to hear that. I argue that I would. Don't leave people wondering for ages causing small psychological eruptions and inflating new pockets of insecurity that have no true origin!  If I find a genie and a lamp, one of those three wishes will be for people to handle truth more wisely.  I have a hard time speaking the truth myself, but I told a guy the other night that I wasn't into him. He was quite flabbergasted.  I ask - well, why? Isn't that possible? Isn't that the reason for a date? And I already knew I wasn't into it. It's my choice to continue on or not - as well as his. I acted first because I already knew. And I was polite about it, but up front.

The best part was when we parted ways, he asked "Well, are we ever going to see each other again?"

Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuh what kind of question is that? I just said I'm not interested and I'm sorry but thanks for the date. A friendly and matter-of-fact "nope" was my answer. And he let out the most cartoonish snort of disbelief, I almost thought he'd been born in Oxford and his name was Sir Charles Billingsworth the III. 

I know.  Some of you might wish to speak in the defense of this young man. But if he were telling his side of things, someone would want to speak up for me too. There are no rights or wrongs in dating, or in this industry for that matter. There are only risks and choices and hopes. Maybe one day I'll find a great guy. Maybe one day I'll find a great role. Focusing on the latter first, but hey...the universe works in mysterious ways and I am NOT interested in stopping that.

Until then, I'd like to agree with ol' Jack Nicholson in that most people just can't handle the....well, you know.  But remember that it will also set you free. I'll take the latter of those two statements as well.

1 comment:

  1. I just have one question Eva, will we ever see each other again????

    Jokes aside, you are a true talent, your hard work and skills will all be worth it.